2/07/2010

Grace, the Flight Attendant

"Good morning, my name is Grace and I will be your flight attendant today!", she said as the door slammed on the Delta flight to Memphis. The curious thing about this was Grace had to be 75 years of if she was a day and reminded me of the sweet little old lady that was the owner of the cartoon character, Tweety Bird that was in constant peril of Sylvester the Cat. In my eight years as a flying road warrior, I've seen some older ones but she was the oldest. In my opinion, it's quite fitting that we would have Grace as our attendant in as much as how the equipment seemed to show a lot of age and wear.

Watching and mulling over the significance of the elderly lady as a flight attendant, I noticed something lying in the seat next to me. It was a part of the overhead reading lamp fixture that had fallen off the console above my head. I decided to reinstall it myself rather than reporting it to Grace. Given their record of maintenance problems, I didn't want to risk delaying the flight.

In advance of serving refreshments, Grace announced with much detail that we would be limited on beverages because of some malfunction involving the ice machine and that somehow this had caused  an hour delay the evening before because the mechanics were trying to fix it but failed and they  were  having to order parts and on and on and on.....Whew!  She not only apologized for that but nearly fell on the sword explaining that there was a shortage of beverages as well. "I have a few Cokes, four Diet Cokes and three Sprites." What was next? Would she take the blame for the Haitian earthquake too?

Now, I'm beginning to think that if Delta is flying granny around the USA on planes that have parts falling off, refrigerators that don't work and potties that are not available, just how bad is the general condition of this plane? In the past five weeks, Delta has either delayed or completely canceled flights for me on at least five occasions for equipment maintenance problems. How old and how worn are thousands of planes flying the friendly skies? Honestly, this alarms me very much.